Lori Cheek was out to dinner with a good friend when he gave his business card to a woman seated a table over.
“I thought it was kind of stealth, the way he just handed off that card and kept on walking,” said Cheek, 38, who lives near Manhattan’s West Village. “The whole scenario just triggered a bunch of ideas in my mind. Somebody can make your heart flutter, and they can pass you by in a second. Why can’t you try and catch them with a card?”
Now you can with Cheek’s not-so-ordinary little black cards. Each carries a flirty phrase and adds a personal touch to the electronic world of online dating. Recipients who have received the cards can use the identification code found on the back to go online and find out who their admirer is and to learn a little more about that person.
“Cheek’d” launched in summer 2010 and joined a relatively new breed of social meeting websites, many of them combining social networking with matchmaking. Some bring “real time” communication to the cyber dating scene with webcam chats (SpeedDate), location-based dating (Skout) and personality games (Goodwizz).
Others offer virtual dating, using avatars for people to interact in a virtual venue (Weopia) before venturing out on a real-life date. A few sites capitalize on people’s preoccupation with good looks as well as their willingness to vote on almost anything (CanDoBetter).
The 20 million Americans who cyber date are estimated by Online Magazine to go online at least once monthly and are willing to spend money to find a mate. In 2008, they spent $1.2 billion on online dating, according to Piper Jaffray Investment Research, and by 2013 their Web spending spree could hit $1.7 billion.
“We understand singles are searching for quality, not quantity,” said Dino Luzzi, CEO of Blast Applications, a Long Island based developer of applications for iPhone, Twitter, Android and Facebook. Luzzi’s CanDoBetter app allows singles to upload pictures of possible partners, get immediate feedback from fellow users and consult dating experts along the way.
How major a force is the Internet when it comes to dating? Two sociologists place the Web on par with perhaps the original social networking mecca — a bar.
A survey of 3,000 people living in the United States who met their mate in 2009 found that a third had initiated contact online. The study, presented to the American Sociological Association in summer 2010, determined that — when it came to first encounters — online chatting trailed only friend introductions. Online chatting finished neck-in-neck with first encounters in a bar.
With any form of dating, safety should always be a concern and online dating is no different— especially since the addition of location-based dating to the Web. It has prompted many states, including New York, to enact legislation to protect potential daters.
The New York State Internet Safety Dating Act, enacted in December 2010, required dating sites to warn users about the perils of romance on the Web, including not giving your phone numbers too soon, not revealing your employer or your last name.
With more than 800 online dating sites, according to Mark Brooks, who edits Online Personals Watch, consumers have many decisions to make before the dating even begins.
The following sites distinguish themselves through their creative capitalization of social networking.
•Think of the process as online dating in reverse, making the connection offline — sparked by the passing of little black cards that can be placed almost anywhere — before taking it online.
“I’ve had my hands in people’s pockets when they don’t even know,” said founder Cheek, who works part time for an upscale furniture store in Manhattan. “It’s fun handing them out where people can see you, but the element of surprise may be the best.”
The cards can be slipped in an order of French fries, on a bread plate, in a gym bag or Cheek’s favorite: atop the lid of a pint of beer—preferably held by the admired drinker. Each carry a fetching phrase like: “Look up. You might miss something,” “I am totally cooler than your date,” or “I just put all my drinks on your tab.”
“The card is a fun ice-breaker,” said Cheek, during a phone interview from her office in Manhattan. “It also marks the beginning of the game. There’s no turning back. It’s done and you don’t have anything to lose except that card. Just don’t forget to smile and wink.”
The Website itself is all about retrieving a person’s information, sharing a couple of sentences and hopefully arranging a meet-up. It was not created for long visits. A pack of 50 cards and a month’s subscription to the Website is $25. There is no fee for recipients to log on.
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